dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
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