so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
Randomize
