good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Randomize
