I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
Whatcha textin bout Willis?
shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
Randomize