is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Theres puke in my trash can and spilled beer next to my bed... come get your girlfriend
How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Randomize
