Three words: puerto rican gang bang
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Randomize
