maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Randomize