Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
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