hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
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