I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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