It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
Randomize
