Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Randomize
