My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
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