I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
Randomize