my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Randomize
