So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
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