i don't like sucking hair
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Randomize
