two words: eviction party
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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