You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
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