I murdered the dance floor call the cops
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Randomize
