I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
What's wrong?
Long week. Sore muscles. Bad back. Hangover. Mini-keg. Crazy ex-wife. Unavailable love-interest. Dead celebrity families. Republicans.
Pussy.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
Randomize
