SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
Randomize
