You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
only if we run a train.
done.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
