you have to choose: penises or morals?
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Randomize