When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
you win again, gameday.
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
Randomize
