so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Randomize
