They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
