Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
Everclear isn't food dammit
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
Randomize