What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
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