did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
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