I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
I just found a bag of teeth...
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
the texts you sent will act as the rosetta stone for all drunk people
I just gargled with NyQuil
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
