i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
