I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize