my sisters under your porch take her home
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Randomize
