i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
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