I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
Randomize
