Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place...
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
We smell like vodka and hangover
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