i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
Randomize