they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
WHO CARES HE GIVES YOU TOE CURLING ORGASMS AND SAYS YOU HAVE KISSABLE SKIN AND RUNWAY MODEL HAIR....WHILE INTOXICATED WITH HIS BEST FRIEND. AND THEN HE SENDS YOU CUTE SELFIES OF THEM!!!!!!! WTF MORE DO YOU WANT FROM LIFE!!! DIE HAPPY ALREADY LADY!!!
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
Randomize
