You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
