this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
I just forgot I was standing up.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize
