we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Randomize
