Porn is love you can see.
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
Randomize
