god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
Did you just see the Batmobile???
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Randomize
