You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Randomize
