One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
Randomize