she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
Randomize
