My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize