So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
Randomize
