i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
Randomize
