im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
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