THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
i out mim tonsoeep
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