so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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